Light

Embracing the Light

Word(s) of the day: renewal, rebirth, transition, light, openness, glee

Winter Night

"On a dark, black night, love lights a lamp."
- Sultan Bahu

Word(s) of the day: reflection, stillness, silence, darkness, peace, hope, celebration

Why the Winter Solstice?

Last week D and I were chatting and the conversation spurred the question: what do these daily reflections have to do with the Winter Solstice?

Good question. I had to think about it.

These three weeks are turning out to be a spiritual journey leading to personal transition - a transition mirroring Nature's own shift from darkness to light. The questions explored and insights received are preparing me for the year to come, helping me shift from an internal to a more outward focus as I welcome 2009.

The new year is when I set out fresh intentions about who I want to be, what I'd like to do and how I'd like to go about doing it. These past few weeks will help shape those intentions.

So why the urge to have this correspond to the Winter Solstice?

Timing is one thing I guess - it conveniently takes place at the end of the calendar year. Connection to all things Nature is another. There's something comforting about timing my personal transition to Mother Nature's; it connects me to something universal and grants me the perspective I need to think beyond my ego. Finally, it just feels right.

Et voilà. Question answered.

Word(s) of the day: change, letting go, journey, curiosity, discovery, connection, Nature, preparation, growth

Being Present

"I got the blues thinking of the future, so I left off and made some marmalade. It's amazing how it cheers one up to shred oranges and scrub the floor."
- D.H. Lawrence

During the past few days I've been caught up in a flurry of (for the most part) self-imposed to-dos and expectations. I'm finding it difficult to stay in the moment, my head always swimming with a list of things I need or want to complete before a certain date. Quite frankly it's draining me of festive cheer, leaving me feeling increasingly detached, cranky and on edge.

That's not who I want to be.

I think the key to breaking the negative cycle is bringing myself back to the moment. If I'm wrapping gifts, I'm wrapping gifts - not worrying about household chores. If I'm having dinner, I'm having dinner - not crafting my next blog post. If I'm crafting a blog post, I'm crafting a blog post. Period.

So tonight I put a call out to my Higher Power for help living in the now. It's easier said than done, but I will practice. Or maybe I just need to take a break to make my own batch of marmalade. :)

Word(s) of the day: stillness, rest, clarity, focus, presence, moment, flow, breather, perfection, expectations, letting go

Nature

At the gates of the forest ... we find Nature to be the circumstance which dwarfs every other circumstance. ... These enchantments are medicinal, they sober and heal us.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We need the tonic of wildness ... We can never have enough of nature.
- Henry David Thoreau

All nature smiles, and the whole world is pleased.

- Day Kellogg Lee

The Earth laughs in flowers.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Self-Knowledge

"And a man said, Speak to us of Self-Knowledge.
And he answered, saying:
Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.
But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart's knowledge.
You would know in words that which you have always known in thought.
You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams.

And it is well you should.
The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea;
And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes.
But let there be no scales to weigh your unknown treasure;
And seek not the depths of your knowledge with staff or sounding line.
For self is a sea boundless and measureless.

Say not, 'I have found the truth,' but rather, 'I have found a truth.'
Say not, 'I have found the path of the soul.' Say rather, 'I have met the soul walking upon my path.'
For the soul walks upon all paths.
The soul walks not upon a line, neither does it grow like a reed.
The soul unfolds itself, like a lotus of countless petals."

- Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

Ego and the Other

"Make your ego porous. Will is of little importance, complaining is nothing, fame is nothing. Openness, patience, receptivity, solitude is everything."
— Rainer Maria Rilke

A porous ego, openness, patience, receptivity. For some reason these words resonated with me today - so I posted them here.

Word(s) of the day: practice, patience, giving, listening, altruism, other, love, compassion, kindness

Links: the spiritual practices of compassion, listening and openness (Spirituality & Practice)

PSA: Winter Solstice Events in the Capital

A bit of a departure from my reflections to date, I thought I'd provide a Public Service Announcement listing of Winter Solstice events I knew were taking place here in Ottawa.

Unfortunately I'll either be out of town or frantically preparing to leave so I probably won't be attending any this year. But for those who will be here, in case you're interested, there are a few things going on:

White Fire Alchemy - A winter solstice gateway concert
A co-creative solo performance of crystal singing bowls, Tibetan metal bowls, vocal overtoning, praying piano, eclectic vocals, Native American flute, shamanic drumming.

Windhorse Yoga Studio's Winter Solstice Mala - 108 sun salutations
Recommended for all levels, moving through Surya Namaskar A 108 times, modifying the sequence and resting according to the needs of individual bodies.

Winter Solstice at the Canada Science and Technology Museum
Daytime activities including an inflatable planetarium, a tour of the Helen Sawyer Hogg Observatory (home of Canada's largest refracting telescope) and horse-drawn sleigh rides; a free evening star party at the observatory.

Winter Solstice Labyrinth Walk
Hosted by the First United Church and All Saints Anglican Westboro, a time of quiet and spiritual renewal, and a welcoming of winter with the warmth of friendship and refreshments.

If anyone's heard of other local events, please let me know!

December Moon

"After a fall of snow
I look out on the field
Shining there in the moonlight
So calm, untouched and white
Snow silence fills my head"
- May Sarton, excerpt from December Moon

Last night I watched the full moon rise and shine her light upon us, creating backlit cloud ripples in the sky and moonshadows on the snow. I was mesmerized by her clarity and for a few powerful moments felt a strong, peaceful belonging to something bigger than myself.

Turns out it was the biggest, brightest full moon of 2008 - December's Full Cold Moon, sometimes also called the Moon before Yule. How timely.

What a powerful reminder of my connection to all things Nature.

Word(s) of the day: light, darkness, connection, Universe, Nature, celestial, cycle, feminine

Link: Farmers' Almanac full moon names and their meanings

Perspective and Gratitude

"Any moment that opens us up to the reality that life is good is a parable of the supreme end for which we were made."
— Lewis B. Smedes, How Can It Be All Right When Everything Is All Wrong?

This morning I left the house in a huff, overwhelmed with some of my perceived Holiday to-dos and annoyed by life's little melodramas. On the way to work I listened to the news which can be a little bleak these days, it got me thinking about those who might be going through tough times this Christmas: the person who just lost his job and might be wondering how he's going to pay his mortgage or put gifts under the tree; the person whose daughter, only in her twenties, just got diagnosed with cancer; the person grieving the death of a loved one, or the loss of a relationship.

I don't have it so bad. In fact, I have it really good; I think I needed a little perspective to remind me just how good.

I'll most likely get cranky again and I'll most likely get annoyed and overwhelmed, but I hope I'll have the presence and strength to stop and count my blessings instead of letting myself spiral into an unwarranted negative funk. 'Cause really, I've nothing to spiral about.

Word(s) of the day: ego, awakening, empathy, others, abundance, perspective, gratitude, thanks

Serenity

"There is another way to serenity. It begins with letting go, not hanging on. It grows in silence and stillness, not through achievement or striving, but through trust and surrender. It thrives in simplicity and expresses itself through the clean lines of quiet movement."
- Mark A. Burch, Stepping Lightly

Clean lines of quiet movement. These words bring me peace. I think I'd like to add that to the list of things I might practice.

Word(s) of the day: letting go, stillness, patience, simple, aligned, calm, quiet, movement, grace

Shadows

morning shadows

“Those unpleasant and immoral aspects of our selves which we would like to pretend do not exist or have no effect on our lives – our inferiorities, our unacceptable impulses, our shameful actions and wishes – this shadowy side of our personality is difficult and painful to admit. It contradicts who we would like to see ourselves as, who we would like to seem to be in the eyes of others. ... The shadow is not actually a problem to be solved but rather an inner entity to be explored, known and recognized as part of our psychic and communal lives.”
- Robert H. Hopcke, A Guided Tour of the Collected Works of C.G. Jung

Which shadows of mine am I ready to explore, recognize and accept as being part of me?

Word(s) of the day: unacceptable self, hidden character traits, darkness and light, yin and yang, accepting and loving the whole

More Rest and Letting Go of Perfection

winter art I

(modified with a cheap photo editor's negative effect)

It's very hard for a perfectionist like me to post a repeat on this Solstice Reflections experiment without admitting defeat. But it's where I'm at tonight; I am tired. I feel a need to forget my perceived to-dos and enjoy warm comforts on a cold winter's night.

So today I post this repeat as part of the experiment and accept it as part of my journey where I let go of my need for perfection and allow myself to relax.

It's harder than I thought it would be. Does anyone else go through this?

Word(s) of the day: rest, stop, be, regenerate, play, expectations, letting go, perfection, experiment, acceptance

Living Deliberately

Deliberate: adj 1 a intentional. b fully considered; not impulsive. 2 slow in deciding; cautious. 3 leisurely and unhurried. v 1 think carefully; take counsel. 2 consider, discuss carefully.

"You approach things with a lot of consideration and thought (to the energy it will take from you, how you want to involve yourself or not, what your goals are, etc.)" a dear friend wrote to me. She's absolutely right.

Whether it's adopting the newest technology, starting a creative project or buying a pair of boots, I definitely approach things with consideration and thought. Of course some things may take less time to consider than others and others are no-brainers to begin with, but for the most part, the reflex to stop and think is there.

What this usually means is that if I do, try or buy something, it's because a) I know I want to, b) I know what impact it will have on my goals or c) I don't know, but am willing to throw caution to the wind and face the consequences. On the flip side, it can also mean difficulty making decisions quickly, missed opportunities, and paralysis by analysis when over-thinking a situation. Balance is key.

I didn't realize this had become so engrained in my psyche until my friend pointed it out. I used to see my deliberation as excessive and boring, but now I'm a lot more accepting and comfortable with it. It allows me to live with intention and it's taken me years of practice to get where I am.

Now if I could only find that balance ...

Word(s) of the day: intention, questioning, decisions, deliberate, choice, consequences, good, bad, peace, balance, acceptance

Rest

Word(s) of the day: stop, sleep, rest, recuperate, regenerate, be

Faith, Growth and my Higher Power

“You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might pray also in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance.”
- Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

My relationship with the Divine has come and gone throughout the years, expressing itself in different ways and different intensities. For the past few years I’ve associated my Higher Power with pain and sadness – my faith being at its peak during difficult times. I didn’t know where else to turn; surrendering to my Higher Power seemed to be the only thing I could do.

When things are good, it’s easier for me to forget that the same Higher Power is at work. But lately I decided to start associating my Higher Power with the abundance and joy that surround me, believing that I can grow and become through joy just as much as I can through pain. That faith doesn’t always come naturally to me, but I feel something has shifted and it's becoming easier. For that I am grateful.

Word(s) of the day: abundance, prayer, connection, Higher Power, humility, gratitude, faith

Small Gestures

"There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; my philosophy is kindness."
— The Dalai Lama

Never underestimate the difference a small gesture can make in a person's day.

Yesterday, in a span of 15 minutes, three seemingly small things made me smile: the office manager's daily note and smiley face on the whiteboard outside her office; an enthusiastic wave from a new work-related acquaintance as he stopped to let me cross the street - not just a mere lift of the hand from the steering wheel, but an earnest grin and full side-to-side hand motion; and finally, the smiles and good mood of the folks at the cafeteria breakfast counter.

Sometimes it's easy to forget little courtesies or acts of kindness as we rush through our day - perhaps even more so during the Holiday season. Yesterday my mood was raised a few notches by the small gestures these people chose to make. I bet you they don't even know.

Never underestimate the difference a small gesture can make in a person's day.

Word(s) of the day: courtesy, smile, kindness, consideration, appreciation, gratitude, karma

Link: the spiritual practice of Kindness (from Spirituality & Practice)

Practice

"Those who 'practice' are always on the road, always learning, always developing and deepening their practice and understanding. This is the case no matter how skillful or adept they may become. Great pianists and dancers still practice. Practice requires openness and humility. It is the attitude of one who communicates and co-operates rather than of one who dominates and controls."
- Mark A. Burch, Stepping Lightly

What could I practice today, this week, or in the coming year?

movement
patience
painting
writing
drawing
listening
letting go
meditating
communicating
simplicity
order
focus
celebration
light-heartedness
acceptance
love
forgiveness
compassion
joyfulness
silliness
non-judgment
discernment
trust
authenticity
fearlessness
empathy
confidence
humility
gratitude
ritual
adequate sleep
healthy eating
being
creating
learning
opening myself to possibility
living with intention
taking risks
cycling
adventure
exploration
wonder
organization
stillness
mindfulness
persistence
spontaneity

What could you practice?

Word(s) of the day: progress, discovery, learning, frustration, persistence, patience

Order

"Order is the shape on which beauty depends."
- Pearl S. Buck

What is the perfect balance between order and chaos? What would allow me to feel at peace in my home, my office or my schedule?

Do I have too much stuff? How much would be just enough? What about commitments?

Order creates space. Clean counters encourage me to cook healthy meals from scratch; a clean desk encourages me to work on my finances, write, or dream up new creative projects; an open schedule allows me to live slowly, explore the unexpected or simply be.

Although the temporary chaos of a creative high or extraordinary events may be stimulating, sustained chaos or clutter leaves me agitated. Order brings me peace. It’s a question of finding the elusive balance that is comfortable and true to me.

Word(s) of the day: tidiness, clutter, simplicity, space, enough, organize, balance

Links: Christine Kane’s Creating Order Part 1 and Part 2

Stillness

“Perhaps it would be a good idea some day, fantastic as it sounds, to muffle every telephone, quiet every motor, and stop all activity – just to give people a chance to ponder and reflect on what life is all about, why they are living, and what they really want.”
- James Truslow Adams

Only by being still can I hear the voice of my intuition. Sometimes being still involves writing in my journal; sometimes it involves a cup of coffee, silence, and staring into space. Either way, quieting my physical environment and dispensing of mental to-do lists gives my inner voice the space to exist and make itself known – although it may take more than one attempt. I must be consistent, and patient.

Today I will be still, even if only for a few minutes. I will stop what I’m doing. I will breathe. I will be present.

Word(s) of the day: stop, listen, be, practice, silence

Welcome - About Solstice Reflections

During the past few years I've come to realize that the Winter Solstice holds a strong spiritual significance for me. I feel a deep connection to the Divine through Mother Nature and her cycles. Through silence and reflection, I acknowledge winter’s transition from darkness to light and the sense of re-birth or renewal that comes with it.

The idea of a countdown to the Winter Solstice has been percolating in my mind and soul for three years, taking various shapes and forms as I entertained its urge to be creatively expressed. This year, with the creation of Solstice Reflections, I feel ready to experiment.

It will be an experiment in creative expression and spiritual reflection. My intent is to post reflections, prompts, words, images or other material on this site each day of December leading up to the 21st. I am not sure yet what form it will all take, but I remain open to the process and where it may lead me.

I invite you to join me on my journey and see where it may lead you.